Makes sense right? Sounds easy? Seems logical? This is one of those things that falls under the category of “common sense is more uncommon than you think.” As sensible, easy, and logical as this concept might seem, it is so much more integral to a relationship than you might first believe. It is another one of those things that can either work well in your favor or build-up to the relationship’s demise.
It is about so much more than giving them the material things they want or taking them to the events they want to attend. This is one of the areas where your true commitment and devotion to the relationship are being tested. How much attention have you been paying? Are you listening to what they say or carefully observing the things they do? Attention to detail is more important than you might think. Momentary distractions that seem inconsequential, like spending too much time on your phone, watching the TV, or even listening to something else while they are talking, can spell disaster.
All of a sudden, strategy and compassion become close teammates. Put them together and you will find that things start to work out in your favor. Subtle comments and behaviors are easy to miss. The statement “that’s pretty” or “wow look at that” can mean so much more than “I want you to see this too.” It is an opportunity. Maybe not at that very moment, but buying that as a gift at a later date, or even talking about it at a later time, you demonstrate that you were paying attention. It is important to show them that the things they like are important. They are important enough to make the things they like or care about important to you as well.
There is no shame in writing things down. Life is difficult and unpredictable. Things happen. Maybe you were paying attention but then things happen that cause you to forget. A missed opportunity, even on accident, is still a missed opportunity. It is easy to get overwhelmed and forget. Writing things down not only helps you remember the places and things, but it also helps to reinforce how important they are to you. Take the time and make the effort. Taking 30 seconds to write something down is a small price to pay for the continued happiness of the person you love.