Unless they are tears of joy, this is one of the worst relationship crimes you can commit. It doesn’t matter if you are male or female, gay or straight, black, white, brown, tan, or any other personal identifier you choose or feel labeled with. I am not saying that it is not OK to cry. I am talking about your words and your actions. Your sense of right and wrong. I am talking about not being ethically or morally absent.
Physical pain is unwelcome in most cases, but so is emotional. There is nothing good or worthwhile to be gained by putting someone into a position of emotional discomfort or distress. Any satisfaction gained from either means you likely have an issue that goes beyond relationship trouble. I advise you to speak to someone about it if that is the case. It doesn’t have to be a professional, but you should definitely talk to someone. There is nothing OK or acceptable about it.
This is one of the biggest regrets I have had in any relationship I was ever in. It doesn’t matter if it was deliberate or by accident. The damage is mostly the same. A broken heart is a broken heart and what is said or done can’t ever be taken back. There is no apology, no present, no recompense. The only way to counter this is to never allow it to happen in the first place. Once the damage is done, you can spend a lifetime trying to make up for it. Know that no matter what you do, that occurrence will always be there, sitting in your past, unable to fully go away.