Lesson 22: Nice and loving gestures

There is something truly special about someone that is constantly letting you know that they are thinking of you.  Letting you know that you are loved and cared about.  A constant reminder that you are in the thoughts and hear of another and that you are deeply cared about.  It doesn’t matter how big or small the reminder is, it is just important that they are there, and they are constant.  No one likes being forgotten, even if they say it is what they want.

I have yet to meet anyone in this world that did not appreciate a well thought out surprise that was meant for them.  It doesn’t even have to be well thought out.  Some flowers and chocolates on the way home can do the job equally as well as a diamond bracelet.  Whether or not you like surprises or presents, it is always nice to know that someone was thinking about you and cared enough to take the time and go out of their way to do something nice for you.  It isn’t just for them.  It keeps your loved ones in your thoughts and heart as well.  

These can be simple things but this is where listening intently, paying attention, and remembering the things they like really come into play.  Nice and loving gestures are where you not only show them how much you love them and care about making them happy, it is an opportunity to show that you were listening to what they said and the things they care about are important to you.  It is a simple and easy way to demonstrate your commitment to what you both share.  It also feels really good to make the person you love feel special.  It is too easy to get so distracted that too much time passes between these gestures.  

Don’t be a fool.  It is not about buying the relationship and paying some kind of “love rent.”  There is no price tag, price expectation, or price limit.  If the price of these gestures is an issue, it is likely you have another problem entirely.  If the other person can’t appreciate the gesture without some kind of financial attachment, it is unlikely that you are in what most people would consider to be a healthy relationship.  These gestures are about frequently reigniting that feeling you got when you were young when someone brought you a present.  The excitement and mystery felt great but the feeling of being special enough to someone that they would get you a present was indescribable.  Don’t get tricked into thinking that these gestures have anything to do with money.  

There doesn’t even have to be money involved.  Go for a nice walk and pick out a nice flower.  If you see a colorful rock that you know they would like or find interesting, grab it, take it home, and put it in a box to wrap and present to them.  It isn’t about the gift itself, it is about the thought attached to it.  That mental connection.  Get to the door first so you can hold it open for them.  Wake up 20 minutes earlier than them and make them some breakfast in bed.  Have a nice big dinner ready for them when they get home from work.  Play a nice slow song in your home and pull them close for a dance.  Hug and kiss them as much as possible.

An endless stream of opportunities exist and they are only limited by your romantic imagination.  This could also serve to bring you closer to your friends.  I recommend bouncing ideas off each other.  Turn it into a competition.  Who can come up with the better or more romantic surprise?  Who can do the most with the least amount of money?  Who can come up with the most creative and off the wall idea that totally blows the others’ mind?  How many ideas can you come up with that the other wants to steal?  Like I said, you are only limited by your own imagination. 

Takeaways:

  1. Most people enjoy a nice surprise.
  2. No one likes being forgotten.
  3. Money should never be an issue.
  4. Don’t treat your gestures like they are some kind of “love rent.”
  5. You are only limited by your imagination.

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